1. Avoid textation-ships! Text-relationships with a guys or girls that you have only met once or twice are useless, meaningless and shallow. If you both don't have the balls to call one another and it's been weeks to months, call it quits early in the cowardly cyber lame game. They don't count as friends either.
2. Exercise instead of eating ice cream when you're depressed - go out for a jog, power walk or swim. Weeee! It will really help you release endorphins. You may end up feeling excited when you think about a break up or drama! I swear! Recently, I had my heart broken by a guy that always finds the best ways to hurt me... The pain was excruciating. I have been roller skating every few days now and I find that I get giddy, even when I think of him! I somehow manage to feel happy that I am no longer burdened with the perils of Him, that douche. If I were sitting around the house eating ice cream and crap, I would sink deeper and develop low self-esteem from the weight gain and stagnation.
3. Best Hangover Cure is, believe it or don't, apple-cider vinegar! I know it sounds gross, but it is extremely good for you! Take one shot and follow with a few glasses of water. For sensitive stomachs, dilute with water. You'll get a quick and subtle buzz that will help balance your equilibrium.
4. Thou Shall Not Flake - If you make plans with someone, don't act like a stereo-typical, self-centered, selfish L.A douche bag and flake - especially last minute. It's rude. If you change your mind for trivial reasons, keep your commitment. It will make you a better person. Furthermore it shows that you are reliable and up for adventure.
5. Have a back up stash of munchies - You never know when your stomach may need sustenance. In your purse or car, always stay equipped with some nuts for filling and candies for saliva and fresh breath.
6. Attention, Men!! Never, ever walk around in a shirt and no underpants!! It is by far one of the most unattractive things ever. And it doesn't matter how sexy you are, it's downright gross and looks silly. Your sexy meter will go down a notch in the subconscious minds of your lovers.
7. Break Cyber Ties - After a (bad) break-up - Don't check up on your ex's MySpace, face book or twitter unless you are completely over them. Otherwise, it becomes masochistic and unproductive. Trust me; once you get passed the first month of stomach knots and sheer heartache, you'll realize that you actually can live without them. By checking their profiles even once in a while, you're subconsciously holding on to the past and rendered powerless over the present.
8. Just say yes! - Every once in a while, it's productive to say yes to something to which you would normally say "no". I'm not talking about drugs or anything that is obviously dangerous or flat out stupid (please have common sense here). Go out with that guy you always said no to. Go hang with that friend that always bugs you to hang out but somehow you're always "too busy" for. Eat that dish that you always strayed away from tasting. You may be pleasantly surprised to see what can happen when you change your natural flow; you could meet someone special, have a fabulous epiphany, find money, run into a special friend, get discovered, or simply discover a new dish. Sounds fun right? Live life; stop being scared of change; everyone deserves some adventure no matter how big or small.
9. Dating Geeks is awesome but dangerous!! Beware of geeks and nerds, as they never got the girl in high school. If they go from having no sex life to having you, a hot chick and a booming sex life, he may try to compensate his feelings of inadequacy for having not gotten girls in the past by cheating on or leaving you to sow his now confident oats. The point is DON'T become a sex and relationship stepping stone for the inexperienced little dweeb!! He'll worship you until he feel he's learned enough. From your intimacy, fashion advice and boosting his ego, he'll get cocky and greedy and chase other women. We all know that the goal for the average man is to sleep with as many women as possible. Dating a guy that has "been there, done that" could actually prove rewarding as he has already had scandalous and meaningless “sexperiences” and is more likely ready to settle down with you. This is why so many hot girls are getting their hearts trampled on; they're downgrading by dating and nerds & geeks and upgrading them to hip and chic. I hope this advice isn't left unabsorbed. I have always been a sincere lover of geeks, personally, and I always will be; I'm just saying, be careful of what kind you deal with.
10. Guys in Relationships are not hot! Well unless that guy is in a relationship with me. I don’t care how good-looking a guy is; don’t chase him or try to seduce him when he is in a relationship with someone else; it’s like going after a guy with snot constantly running down his nose. As soon as I find out a guy has a girl, I become repelled by him; especially if he’s hitting on me. Yeah, like a cheating spineless douche bag is what really turns me on! Hitting on and flirting with a taken guy is bad karma, gross and tacky. Why would you even waste you time seeking the validation by tempting the dog out of a man AND fucking another girl over? We all know how much it would suck to be the girl getting cheated on, so let’s promote a little more sister-hood and respect another woman’s territory. Plus, don’t you want to be the only one he caters to and worships?
No comments:
Post a Comment