21. The line between cuddle buddy and friend with benefits - is quite thin actually. Men tend to read too much into cuddling than chicks. If we like you, cuddling means the world; if not, you're JUST a cuddle buddy which means: no boob touching, no kissing, no poking us with your morning wood, no sleeping naked, or watching porn. Awkward. Spooning is okay, as is gentle back scratching and massaging. Don't get too fresh, Big fella.
22. Compliments make you a better person - One compliment can go a long way! Studies show that giving compliments helps boost your self-esteem. Don't be stingy; kill two birds with one stone and give a GENUINE compliment the next person you see or talk to.
23. Don't post all 30 pictures from your self photo shoot on your myspace, facebook, ect. You're wearing the same thing. The background is the same and is usually a bathroom door or bathroom floor. Every picture shows minimal, if any, changes in expression and angles. Why are you doing this to us? I don't have the time to dissect which one is the best; you do it your damn self. Man, I wish I could express how lame that makes you look. I don't want to hurt any one's feelings; I am just trying to help you out. Pick the best 2 or 3 and commit.
24. Homie Hoppers are Tic-Tac-Gross! Homie Hoppers are insecure lazy, non-profit hookers that don't have what it takes to venture past their front lawn for new relationships or hook-ups. So, they end up hooking up with their friends, their friends' friends, their exes friends and their friends exes. They eventually turn cliques into groups of inbreeds. Yuck. Homie Hoppers don't look 3 feet ahead of themselves, disregard their degradation, future reputation and the people they'll hurt. If the average group of guys you hang out with on a daily basis all have had sex or a even made out with you, you need to do some serious introspection. You are artless and classless. Tic-Tacky-Gross. You're embarrassing yourself. I feel bad for you.
25. Why do twenty-something people refer to themselves as old? It's like saying you're rich because you have 25 cents instead of a dollar. I'm 26 and loving it. I'm not getting younger so I try to make sure to savor every moment in my fun, rip roaring 20's.
26. Don't share toothbrushes. Nasty.
27. Stop pinning men up on white horses and chariots. Most women basically think of what their wedding dress will look like within minutes of meeting a guy they like. Stop doing this. You're embarrassing yourself. Take him for what he is in that moment. Look forward to the adventure. Go with the flow. Ride the tide. Feel alive.
28. Stop telling guys their penises are small! when you're mad at or breaking up with them. I mean, if you know it's small, chances are he does, too. Why remind him of his dick bits that he'll never shake off in life? And def don't say it to a guy who knows he's packing 'cause it'll make you look desperate for a way to hurt him; he wont care since every other girl tells him how massive and magical his staff is... Overall, it's a pretty harsh thing to say. It hurts men and their egos and sometimes their sex drive. The baby dick talk is something to be had with your girlfriends; that's when you can get ruthless and say things like, "he had a baby dick anyway. I never knew when he was inside me." Just feel sorry for the next girl; in fact, buy her a magnifying glass and help her find his mini stick. Have some self control and stop being a spiteful bitch. Kiss.
29. Text Etiquette - Some are incredibly asinine and don't deserve responses. If some one isn't texting you back it's because they don't care. Back off.
30. Douche Detective says, " If a guy compliments himself within minutes of your meeting him (i.e - "i have a big dick", "Awesome my tattoos are", "I'm a musician", boasts about success or status) he is a certified douche and will probably try to kiss you because he bought you a drink and told you to keep the change. And he'll try this in front of the entire bar/party.. ugh.. guys stop it! It's so gnarly. And we feel kinda bad rejecting you in front of everyone but you give us no choice because 1. We don't want to kiss you. 2. We wont pity kiss you while making ourselves look like bar skanks. Damn douche!
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